Burnout is people using Success to Hide Their Suffering

Got into the C-Suite at 30.

One of 3 in my class to graduate the 1st time in the #1 University in the UK at the time.

Drafted and trained with the National Men's Volleyball team at 17.

#1 choice goal keeper for the reigning National Intercol Champions.

Student of the year, every year in my faculty at University.

Promoted every year in my first 5 years of employment.

I told myself I wanted to reach my maximum potential and excel at everything I did and that is what led to my successes.

I wanted to honour god for him giving me life.

Bullsh!t.

I was vehemently pursuing success to hide my suffering, unconsciously.

What was I suffering from?

Suffering from one my NEEDS not being met as a child.

The NEED for recognition. We also have the need for Belonging, Safety, Certainty, etc.

In my early years, when I participated in sports, made the team, won competitions in scouting and I got home expecting (as any child would) some sort of pat on the back, NOTHING.

Not even an 'How was it?', 'Did you have fun?', 'Tell me how it went'

Crickets...............

Nothing...........

I later learned how these events make a mark in our unconscious minds.

Children never think that their parents are at fault, they think it is them.

How could the people who provide for me, brought me into this world, cleaned me, ...... not think I am good enough for recognition?

It cannot be them, it must be me.

So the little Shane made an unconscious decision to achieve 'success' so that he can finally get the recognition he was looking for all along from my dad.

That meant excelling at University, putting in the extra hours.

That meant doing another course right out of university because I wanted to get ahead of all the people with the same degree.

That meant going above and beyond the call of duty, late nights and weekends at the office.

That meant crushing my goals.

Thankfully I had balance goals, health goals, extra curricular goals, travel goals and I crushed those, which meant that I was able to starve off Burnout. But it could have easily happened.

I was using Success to hide my Suffering.

And many people are doing that today, unconsciously.

People who are not able to find the balance will Burnout and most are in the process of Burnout but putting on a brave face.

Processing the Root Cause of Burnout is essential and most solutions today are only surface level causing only temporary relief, if any.

Traditional therapy/EAP is not the answer.

It is critical to discover the DRIVERS of the Burnout Behaviours, the BELIEFS behind them and their VALUE SYSTEM.

This is the level where the change needs to take place for it to be quick and lasting.

Quick changes last longer and even permanent and there are very specific techniques for quick and permanent change of Beliefs and Behaviours.